The Mae West attributed quote “flattery will get you everywhere” may have been true.
A new study in the Journal of Marketing Research shows that flattery leaves a lasting and positive impression of the flatterer, even when people believe it is insincere. In the experiment, participants were shown a flyer from a fictitious clothing store complimenting them for being stylish and chic. It didn’t matter to the participants that the compliment wasn’t aimed specifically at them or that there was a clearly articulated ulterior motive asking them to shop at the store. They were 50% more likely to choose a coupon from the store that flattered them over a coupon from a similar store.
On a conscious level, the students discounted the value of the compliment because of its impersonal nature and the ulterior motive. But careful assessment of their unconscious feelings — known in research as implicit attitudes — revealed they felt more positively about the store than participants who hadn’t seen the flyer. This study supports several others showing that gut feelings are stickier than conscious opinions.
The authors conclude that our susceptibility to flattery stems from an innate desire to feel good about ourselves. This belief has important ramifications for us as marketers. If we persuade a customer consciously using rational facts, they will retain the conviction until a better counterargument comes along. However, if we persuade a customer on a gut level however, they will retain the belief even in the face of contradictory evidence.
On the surface, it seems like we ought to be able to apply this technique with interpersonal relationships or at work. For example, perhaps we could use insincere flattery to convince our boss into giving us a better performance review and a raise.
Apparently, we can’t. According to research from Darren Treadway and others, if a supervisor perceives a subordinate’s flattery as insincere, the employee will be rated lower on job performance. The supervisor will only rate the employee higher if he/she truly believes that the sentiment is sincere. Unfortunately, most flatterers are taking a risk because they aren’t very good at it.
Harvard Business Review asked Treadway to try to explain the fundamental difference in the two studies. Treadway speculated that perceived sincerity flattery may be more important with personal interactions. Insincere flattery does not change gut feelings when delivered face-to-face.
If you’re not careful, flattery will get you nowhere.